14 Comments

"The way out is through", can't agree more.

I would add that that's probably the only way. Repressing what is there is like putting a lid on a boiling pot. Sooner or later it will boil out in one form or the other.

What you've written strongly reminds me of the theory of Psychological Acceptance. It works on the premise that the first step to healing is acceptance of our negative emotions. Only after we accept those feelings, they can ease.

As Carl Rogers puts it "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change."

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Yes, indeed. And this approach adds that what matters is to stay with the "negative" emotion, where is alive in the body. Which progressively leads to self knowledge, acceptance and integration.

This might also bring awareness of the root causes. But more as a side effect, than as a main goal.

In this sense, it is different from most psychological work I am aware of.

Indeed, here we do not focus on digging and understanding, but we rather allow what needs to be known to emerge organically, experientially and bottom-up, in the form of insight.

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Yes. As far as I understand, the theory of psychological acceptance is focused on the practice of staying with emotions in opposition to escaping or resisting them. It's not about understanding the root causes, but about allowing us fully experience them.

I believe that your approach enriches the acceptance practice by going a step deeper. It helps to connect the mind with the body. Understanding our emotions on the somatic level.

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I'll research that!

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I loved what you said! I have those days occasionally. I used to try to fight it and force myself to work. Now, if it is possible, i decide to take a mental health day, and just take the time to rest and care for myself. But... if I cant, I love your idea! Thanks for writing!

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Thanks for this message. It is a good reminder of why I should keep writing :)

I used to do the same with work. Pushing through.

Until it did not work anymore. The body and mind say stop. And I've had to deal with the bitter truth. Which, in the end, I have found out not to be so bitter at all.

https://livmkk.substack.com/p/being-a-workaholic-is-easy

I have never lived a fuller life than I do now. And I am grateful for that.

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Great article and strategies, it resonated with me so much!

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I am glad you have appreciated it 🥳🥳🥳

You've written something along these lines?

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Yes, I have written a few piece about emotions and emotional health - the closest to yours is this one: https://conqueringburnout.substack.com/p/how-emotional-release-can-improve

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Great piece indeed!

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Livio, Sometimes I say to myself "So this is what __________ feels like today". It seems to help. D

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That’s how I formulate my habit! Helps me to anchor it to a fact, or emotion I’ feeling.

“When I feel _[insert emotion]_ , I will stay with it for 5-10 minutes (or even just 10 breaths if that is all I can do)”

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What do you put in the ___ ? An emotion? A fact?

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Livio, For me the _________ is the sum of small things that add up to the moment. Emotion is usually the trigger, but it can be an event. So this is what winning feels like today or this is what trying feels like today. This is what the sunshine feels like today. Thanks for asking. D

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