Abstractions apart, some of those principles might also work well to figure out where to get to. In particular, 1. Just listening (to ourselves) and 3. Working less than our client (getting inputs from outside).
However, the most difficult thing to remember is to be patient, give ourselves time and trusting that the dots will connect at some point in the future.
Which is exactly what inspired me to write this other short piece as a reminder ;)
"If there were no desire to heal, the damaged and broken met along, this tedious path I've chosen here, I certainly would've walked away, By now. And I still may. I still may.
Be patient. Be patient. Be patient.
I must keep reminding myself of this." (The Patient, Tool)
Oh, yes. And not only patience, kindness to ourselves. This is especially true when we realize we have been on the wrong path. People were hinting that we were, but we were listening. We may even be embarrassed by the whole circumstance. I’ve been there. Took two years off. Did good work. Studied and wrote a lot, and made a major change in my life that has carried me through to today. What you speak is real wisdom.
That sounds like an incredible journey. It takes a great deal of courage to take 2 years off work.
And I agree with you on kindness. I am starting my days asking myself "How can I be kinder with myself today?". And often the reply is simply "Give yourself the time" ;) Hence the link with patience.
Would you like to share any majour change that you have introduced in your life that relates to kindness?
I am currently on a career break and would be extremely interested...
Big topic. There were several major changes that I’ve made over the past decade.
Prior to taking two years off, I experienced three losses within a year and a half. My consulting practice dried up following the Great Recession. I was then fired from the leadership of the non-profit organization that I directed. When the organization’s purpose is raise money, and the board refuses to contribute, it ultimately leads to firing the executive and six months later closing all together. In the midst of those two losses, my marriage of thirty years ended. So the next two years, I had a job that had no pressure, paid my bills, and allowed me to breathe and think about what I really wanted for the rest of my life. So, I started over by moving across the country. Except for a couple of former commitments, I left the organizational contexts that I had spent the previous 35 years working in. I stopped consulting. Just in the last month, I have agreed to my first consulting contract in a decade. When I moved, I invested in developing my skills as a writer. Meaning I hired people to help me. I wrote and published my first book in 2018. The launch of the book was a failure. I spent the next year traveling the country doing book events, meeting people, and coming to the next major point of change. In August 2019, I woke up in the middle of the night realizing that a chapter of my life that had begun in 1984, was over. It was the quest to understand leadership and develop a model to communicate that perspective. I didn’t know what the next chapter was to be. Without making this story impossibly long, five months later, I was in Africa doing leadership training in a rural economic development program. Two trips there, prior to the COVID pandemic, seemed to point to spending the next ten years traveling all around Africa as a trainer. The pandemic’s social orders were instituted a week after I returned home. Not knowing what the future held, I wrote. Over the next fifteen months, I wrote seven short books. In the midst of that, I had an offer to sell my home for a huge profit, which I did. I moved back to North Carolina and paid off all my debts. During the next 15 months I was back in this space of not knowing what to do. I didn’t feel settled. I was in some deep transition and remain there to this day. I knew I had something to say. But no audience, which was the problem with the book launch four years before. I began to write on Substack last January. So far I’ve posted over a hundred columns. About six months ago, a new audience began to appear. Enough that it leads to the creation of a podcast to launch next month. If there is any lesson here, it is the following. We are all in transition. The only way is to not to fall behind by settling for some marginalized safe life. Take advantage of the opportunities that are in front of you within reach. I have a purpose for impact with the knowledge, skills, and experience that enable me change the context of my work when the opportunities arise. It is important to know who you are; who you are not; what you value defined by what you are unwilling to compromise on; and the kind of things that bring you joy in life. In all of that there will be suffering and hardship. But those experiences don’t have to define us. If there is one thing ultimately to say in particular about the last ten years, it would be: Change early and change a lot. I know that I am not done. And it should be said that as a person of faith, all of this has transpired believing that God is the midst of the process.
I resonated with 2 in particular - relax my own striving and take a stand of not knowing. I particularly like this second one - being lost for words - as I do believe that it is in the space of not knowing that insight comes. I've seen it many times with clients and it's an exciting moment!
Before beginning anything, be clear about your purpose for impact. A of time is wasted wandering around in circles trying to figure out where to go.
And what if there is nowhere to go? :)
Abstractions apart, some of those principles might also work well to figure out where to get to. In particular, 1. Just listening (to ourselves) and 3. Working less than our client (getting inputs from outside).
However, the most difficult thing to remember is to be patient, give ourselves time and trusting that the dots will connect at some point in the future.
Which is exactly what inspired me to write this other short piece as a reminder ;)
https://livmkk.substack.com/p/developing-patience-in-times-of-uncertainty
"If there were no desire to heal, the damaged and broken met along, this tedious path I've chosen here, I certainly would've walked away, By now. And I still may. I still may.
Be patient. Be patient. Be patient.
I must keep reminding myself of this." (The Patient, Tool)
Oh, yes. And not only patience, kindness to ourselves. This is especially true when we realize we have been on the wrong path. People were hinting that we were, but we were listening. We may even be embarrassed by the whole circumstance. I’ve been there. Took two years off. Did good work. Studied and wrote a lot, and made a major change in my life that has carried me through to today. What you speak is real wisdom.
That sounds like an incredible journey. It takes a great deal of courage to take 2 years off work.
And I agree with you on kindness. I am starting my days asking myself "How can I be kinder with myself today?". And often the reply is simply "Give yourself the time" ;) Hence the link with patience.
Would you like to share any majour change that you have introduced in your life that relates to kindness?
I am currently on a career break and would be extremely interested...
Big topic. There were several major changes that I’ve made over the past decade.
Prior to taking two years off, I experienced three losses within a year and a half. My consulting practice dried up following the Great Recession. I was then fired from the leadership of the non-profit organization that I directed. When the organization’s purpose is raise money, and the board refuses to contribute, it ultimately leads to firing the executive and six months later closing all together. In the midst of those two losses, my marriage of thirty years ended. So the next two years, I had a job that had no pressure, paid my bills, and allowed me to breathe and think about what I really wanted for the rest of my life. So, I started over by moving across the country. Except for a couple of former commitments, I left the organizational contexts that I had spent the previous 35 years working in. I stopped consulting. Just in the last month, I have agreed to my first consulting contract in a decade. When I moved, I invested in developing my skills as a writer. Meaning I hired people to help me. I wrote and published my first book in 2018. The launch of the book was a failure. I spent the next year traveling the country doing book events, meeting people, and coming to the next major point of change. In August 2019, I woke up in the middle of the night realizing that a chapter of my life that had begun in 1984, was over. It was the quest to understand leadership and develop a model to communicate that perspective. I didn’t know what the next chapter was to be. Without making this story impossibly long, five months later, I was in Africa doing leadership training in a rural economic development program. Two trips there, prior to the COVID pandemic, seemed to point to spending the next ten years traveling all around Africa as a trainer. The pandemic’s social orders were instituted a week after I returned home. Not knowing what the future held, I wrote. Over the next fifteen months, I wrote seven short books. In the midst of that, I had an offer to sell my home for a huge profit, which I did. I moved back to North Carolina and paid off all my debts. During the next 15 months I was back in this space of not knowing what to do. I didn’t feel settled. I was in some deep transition and remain there to this day. I knew I had something to say. But no audience, which was the problem with the book launch four years before. I began to write on Substack last January. So far I’ve posted over a hundred columns. About six months ago, a new audience began to appear. Enough that it leads to the creation of a podcast to launch next month. If there is any lesson here, it is the following. We are all in transition. The only way is to not to fall behind by settling for some marginalized safe life. Take advantage of the opportunities that are in front of you within reach. I have a purpose for impact with the knowledge, skills, and experience that enable me change the context of my work when the opportunities arise. It is important to know who you are; who you are not; what you value defined by what you are unwilling to compromise on; and the kind of things that bring you joy in life. In all of that there will be suffering and hardship. But those experiences don’t have to define us. If there is one thing ultimately to say in particular about the last ten years, it would be: Change early and change a lot. I know that I am not done. And it should be said that as a person of faith, all of this has transpired believing that God is the midst of the process.
It’s so beautiful. This is an article in itself, which you could publish it.
Your core lesson resembles the “Impermanence” concept, so important for Buddhists. Or the Greek “Panta rei” (everything flows).
You’ve definitely made me reflect on where to “change early, and change often”.
And I’m so glad that writing is one of the passions we have in common! Seems like it’s one of your life constants.
I resonated with 2 in particular - relax my own striving and take a stand of not knowing. I particularly like this second one - being lost for words - as I do believe that it is in the space of not knowing that insight comes. I've seen it many times with clients and it's an exciting moment!
The space of not knowing allows us to be taken by surprise! And that's when the real growth seems to happen.
Yes. I have to write every day.
Useful tips.
Very good insights.
Maybe I should try to play golf now! 😅
Recently listened to this podcast by Tim Ferriss which complements this post well.
https://open.spotify.com/episode/5tdzZ1yUZMDiz2hulYsCD2?si=awaoKsWDTBKvd-_Wm5ATKA&context=spotify%3Ashow%3A5qSUyCrk9KR69lEiXbjwXM
Nice, Martin. Thanks. Any specific part of the episode (or idea) yo recommend? Is it about "The value of hacks"?